Forum News: Wow, it’s actually an infomercial

Billy Mays here with selling by yelling!

*sigh*

Have you found yourself searching desperately for someone with whom to discuss all things Sega? Are you an avid Sega Addicts fan who wants to get involved with the site? Would you be considered a crazy person by most psychological review boards? Do you get hungry when people you know are killed by bank robbers? If you answered yes to any or all of those questions then fear no more – we have just the solution for you!

Pat Reddick here with Forum News! Never again will you find yourself in a situation where you have something Sega-related to say with nowhere to say it. The Sega Addicts forum literally saves Christmas every time you post in it AND it’s free to join! Still not convinced that the Sega Addicts Forum has everything you want and more? Hit the jump to find out why with Sega Addicts you’ll never cry!


(Side Note: In case you don’t remember, I’m doing this because we beat challenge 2 – get the thread count to 85 or higher – I… I’m sorry.)

You know, there was a time when I felt so out of control of my life that I actually installed a steering wheel on my sternum. It didn’t work! Then I used the Sega Addicts forum and instantly I noticed that my actions were beginning to have an impact on important things like which games will be chosen for the first high score badge! Then I realized that people here actually care about which 3 Dreamcast games I would chose to be stranded forever with. They even cared about my opinion on a Sega Addicts theme song. Simply incredible.

I can't believe I'm still going either!

But it doesn’t stop there! Have you ever found yourself not listening to a podcast? Well you can rectify that racially-motivated crime against humanity by listening to not 1, not 2, but 3 Sega Addicts related podcasts! Mesmerizing. The Sega Addicts Forum even lets you break it down to eat breakfast, weird stuff, and foods great for student budgets. To recap, that’s 3 anti-genocidal podcasts and up-to 3 euphoria inspiring meals all for the low price of $0.00. That kind of value can’t be found anywhere else for such a great price.

But Sega Addicts isn’t through yet. If you act now we’ll include all the zaniness of the Bar, now complete with a thread all about the glory of popular Internet-based video service YouTube. Then feel free to play the game all the kids are playing – Question!? Take a question, leave a question, just like 7-11 except better because SEGA ADDICTS!!!!!!!!! Also, there is The Bar and Stevie’s Forum, which practically sell themselves like shameless coke whores! These threads could be valued as high as $0.63 EACH, but they’re yours completely free of charge!

"What does any of this have to do with the Magic Bullet?"

Great question, Thelma! Although we are a Sega fan-site we do have a board all about non-Sega gaming that allows you to make ORGANIC BABY FOOD! SET IT AND FORGET IT! BILLY MAYS!!!… uh… Non-Sega Gaming… like Zeno Clash and Horror Games. Not sure what happened there, but whatever it was it was absolutely 100% totally completely adverb free of charge! Now for the moment all of you at home have been waiting for: SEGA! Whether it’s Elemental Gimmick Gear, Sega Merchandise, or images of Sonic, we have the Sega-related content for you! Can it be any better?

Just to recap, we at Sega Addicts love to hear your opinion. Did you know that now at Sega Addicts you can give us you opinion on Art Films and My Little Pony! Then give us your input on some music you’ve been listening to recently. Well, we also care about your own personal art! That’s right, for an unlimited time only you can document your Photography, Writing or Visual Art! With opportunities like those it’s no wonder why Sega Addicts is Brazil’s number 1 Sega fan-site!

..I’m sorry. As you may be able to tell we destroyed the challenges last week. ScottyMoFoSho also won the opportunity to determine the newest character to add to the background image! Check in next week for a coherently written Forum News, complete with a new set of challenges! For now I will see you in the forums!

Readers Comments (4)

  1. It sounds too good to be true! How much did you say it was again?

  2. Yes, people. My Little Pony. You know you want to.

  3. These forums even cut through leather shoes!

    I’m dialing right now! Credit card in hand!

  4. Manic Maverick July 26, 2011 @ 7:46 PM

    Reading this entire post in a really excited, screaming manner is the funniest thing of all time. Also, Thelma looks like she’s saying “If you don’t post I’LL SHOVE THIS STRAIGHT UP Y–“

Comments are closed.